(Hint: Only if there’s an eclipse.)

Back in April 2024, everybody was buzzing about the total solar eclipse. It was supposed to generate millions of dollars in tourism. People took time off from work, pulled their kids out of school, and headed off in caravans to find the best viewing spot.

Me? I had zero interest in looking at anything that could make my already bad vision even worse. Or make me go blind entirely.

The only time I’ve ever been remotely interested in an eclipse was when Delores Claiborne allegedly used it as the perfect cover to murder her abusive husband.

Stephen King Wrote This?

In case you haven’t seen it, Delores Claiborne is a movie based on the novel by Stephen King, starring the incomparable Kathy Bates.

I’m not a huge SK fan by any means. I still can’t believe the man who wrote Cujo is responsible for not one, but three of my favorite movies — Misery, The Shawshank Redemption, and Delores Claiborne.

Flashbacks That Actually Work

Delores Claiborne is a psychological thriller that revolves around a housekeeper accused of murdering her wealthy employer, Vera Donovan.

Set on a small island town off the coast of Maine, the story flashes back to another pivotal event — the day of the great eclipse, when Delores’s abusive husband disappeared.

The way the film handles flashbacks is simply brilliant. Normally I hate flashbacks — they’re usually clunky and confusing.

But in Delores Claiborne, the past and present are seamlessly woven together.

The cinematography even shifts between timelines — cool, misty blue for the present, rich warm tones for the past.
It’s one of the few movies where flashbacks actually enhance the story.

Vera Donovan Steals the Show

Kathy Bates and Jennifer Jason Leigh (who plays Delores’s grown daughter, Selena) are excellent, but the real scene stealer is Judy Parfitt as Vera Donovan.

She’s the one who famously says:

“Sometimes being a bitch is all a woman’s got to hold on to.”

and later, the chilling:

“Sometimes an accident can be an unhappy woman’s best friend.”

It’s Vera’s eclipse viewing party that sets the climactic scene into motion — and shows just how far a woman will go when she’s finally had enough.

What I Thought About During the Eclipse

So, while others gazed up at the heavens that day, wearing their cardboard glasses and making TikToks,
I was thinking about Delores.

And Vera.

And about how sometimes silence — and a little clever timing — speaks louder than anything else.

Don’t worry, I don’t have a husband to murder.

But if I did… let’s just say I’d be very suspicious of any wife offering whiskey and a DIY eclipse box.

Stay safe out there.

And remember:

Sometimes an accident can be an unhappy woman’s best friend.